A Very Avangers Christmas
by Shirahoshi
Summary: Tony cannot be even asked to buy a Christmas tree. But what's Christmas without a Christmas tree? Thor might have just the right idea how to and with what replace it...


To say that Natasha was angry, would have been an understatement.

She was furious.

All she had asked from Tony to buy a tree. One godforsaken tree for Christmas.

Did he do so for once as she asked? No. Of course not. After all, he is Tony Stark, billionaire, playboy...

And the most annoying prick she had ever known.

Wait, that's not true. That was Loki. Yet, it seemed like he was really stubborn about becoming the number one.

"You have had three weeks, Stark," she hissed, not unlike a snake, "Three weeks. All I asked was to buy ONE tree. That could have been bought practically anywhere in this city. You could have bought one in Russia and bring it here within three weeks! So pray to tell, what made you unable to do so?"

"Time is money. JARVIS can generate a very good holographic picture of a Christmas tree, and he can reproduce the scent as well..."

"Can you touch a holographic picture?"

Tony frowned.

"Well, no, but..."

"But? But? But what?"

"Seriously, Tasha, chill..."

"No, I won't 'chill'! I can't believe that I cannot ask a small favour from you, because you think you can do everything so much better!"

_All_ she wanted was a more-less perfect, calm Christmas. With her friends.

Which didn't include a holographic tree.

Although she didn't understand why was she so worked up. Christmas was to celebrate love, harmony and peace. And love is for children, did she not say so?

_There is difference between love and love, _said a small voice in the back of her head.

_Shut up,_she answered. Any kind of love, and she'd break one of the most important rules she sat up for herself - do not make bonds that can be shattered.

_Then, what about harmony and peace? Plus, isn't friendship a bond?_ _If it is, why do you think of them as friends, instead of simply comrades?_

The spy sighed. Ever since the Avengers finally come to really work as a team, things were getting... Confusing around her.

Some of them due to the very real Norse god behind her, who was peering into the kitchen through the door.

"Lady Romanoff? What troubles you?"

"Nothing," she said. To her annoyance, she could _feel _the thunderer smile.

"I don't have to be Loki, or some other master liar who is also good at detecting lies to tell that it was a lie."

She could have lied in a way that wouldn't have been detectable. She even managed to fool his adopted brother that way.

But looking at his face that was lit by childish happiness, because for once he could find out somebody was lying, she decided she wouldn't tell him that.

"Okay! Fine. Tony troubles me."

"The man of iron? What did he do?"

"Nothing. And that's the problem. I only asked him to help me out with mini-party, meaning he was ought to buy _one_ tree, but did he do so? Oh, no..." She laughed dryly. "And now here we are, tree-less, and it begins within the hour." Although, it wasn't exactly Tony's fault. Not alone. She could have checked whether he has the tree or not days before...

"What kind of tree are you talking about?"

"A Christmas tree. I'm sure Jane told you about those."

"Are they the one you put lights and decorations on?"

"Yes."

He suddenly smiled, even wider than before, as if something just came to his mind. Natasha gave him a surprised look as he turned on his heels, stroding towards one of the balconies.

"Where are you going?"

"Do not worry, Lady Romanoff. You shall have your tree. I have an idea."

_**-merry-christmas-folks-**_

"Loki? That is your idea?" The woman was glaring at the odd duo in shock. Especially the black haired one, who looked like he was in quite a discomfort himself.

Although that might be because of the gag. Or that he looked like he hasn't been eating well since months.

"Yes."

"_That_ definitely sounds like a very, very, very bad idea," chirped Stark. Thor raised a hand.

"Just wait a second. Brother, show them what we talked about."

Loki shot a look at the older demi-god, that could be recognised as a "you'll pay for this with your blood" look anywhere, on any planet, before nodding.

_**-merry-christmas-folks-**_

If nothing else, Clint's reaction when they told him WHO exactly was their tree, worth the whole trouble.

Even if the tree wasn't really real. But still more real than a holograph would've been, so Natasha wasn't complaining.

And nobody could miss the looks the archer was shooting the "tree", his eyes full of satisfaction.

"It truly is a good Christmas. And who'd have guessed that the one to level New York down, make Fury desperate, and put the people into misery would make such a beautiful Christmas tree?" he said.

"**I'll make sure you'll regret this day as long as you live. And when you die, you'll die slowly, in agony, screaming...**" Loki's voice filled the room, coming from practically every direction.

"I don't know much about Asgard, Thor," said the Iron Man, "but are the trees supposed to talk there?"

"No, my friend, not really."

"**Starting with you, Stark.**"

"Splendid. Hey, Clint what is it? I can't read it..."

"It's a wine."

"I could guess that much. What type?"

"Bull's Blood. I got it in Budapest."

_**-merry-christmas-folks-**_

**So. Merry Christmas, folks! (Sorry, I couldn't leave out Budapest from the end. :P )**

**I originally intended to make it as a comic, but due to my lack of skills with drawing... Here you have it. Not funny, not fluffy, not... Anything, I just wanted to write something...**


End file.
